Obstacles to Success in PA-A

Obstacles to Success in PA-A

Obstacles to Success in Parental Alienation Anonymous (PA-A) (adapted from Al-Anon)
All PA-A discussions should be constructive, helpful, loving and understanding. In striving toward these ideals, we avoid topics that can lead to dissension and distract us from our common goals.

1.Discussions of Religion/Politics: PA-A.org (adapted from Al-Anon) is not allied with any sect or denomination. It is a spiritual program, based on no particular form of religion or politics. Everyone is welcome, no matter of what affiliation or none. Let us not defeat our purpose by entering into discussions concerning specific religious/political tenets.

2.Gossip/Rumor: We meet to help ourselves and others to learn and use the PA-A.org (adapted from Al-Anon) philosophy. In such group dynamics, gossip and rumor can have no part in the program. We do not discuss members of other groups; our dedication to anonymity gives people confidence in PA-A.org. TO PROTECT ANONYMITY...“What we hear in a meeting stays in that meeting“. Careless repeating of matters heard at meetings or matters shared in confidence can defeat the very purpose for which we are joined together.

AT EVERY PA-A MEEING WE READ THE SAME CLOSING……
a- “In closing, we would like to say that the opinions expressed here are strictly those of the person who gave them”.  Take what you like and leave the rest. “Principles before personalities”, we will not like everyone all of the time, please take the pieces that resonate with you and leave the rest.
b- “The things you heard here were spoken in confidence and should be kept confidential.  Keep them within the walls of this room and the confines of your mind.What we hear in a room stays in that room in order to create a safe place, protect everyone’s anonymity and to maintain group autonomy.
c- “Talk to each other, reason things out with someone else but let there be no gossip or criticism of one another.  Instead, let the understanding, love and peace of the program grow in you one day at a time.” Reach out to your sponsor or another trusted person to work out your triggers and or conflicts on the meeting or personal level. Not everyone in a meeting will be willing or able to work out challenging emotions.

3.Dominance: “Our leaders are chosen not to govern, but to serve. No member of PA-A (adapted from Al-Anon) should direct, assume authority or give advice. Our program is based on suggestion, interchange of experience, rotation of leadership. Each person makes progress in his or her own way and pace. Any attempt to manage or direct is likely to have disastrous consequences for group harmony.”

a- “Our leaders are chosen not to govern, but to serve.” Every person who maintains any position on the meeting level or organizational level is a volunteer.
b- “Our program is based on rotation of leadership and is service-driven.” This program cannot continue to grow and support folks struggling with any form of PA if there aren’t new people volunteering and continuously cycling into service positions.
c- “Any attempt to manage or direct is likely to have disastrous consequences for group harmony.” In any organization there will be conflicts and differing of opinions. Meetings are autonomous and have group consciences to find solutions to any meeting conflicts. Any organizational conflicts will be addressed at secretary’s quarterly meetings or by the governing board. The governing board will be in place in 2023.

2 Comments

  1. Daniel Martin Liknes

    Please jelpme find peace and inner strength

    • The 12-steps are a path to inner peace. They are for folks that are willing to do a bunch of interpersonal work. If you’re tired and want a different quality of life this is a great option. It has saved and changed my life. I suggest going to 4-5 meetings a week, get on the phone list, find a sponsor and start working the steps with your sponsor. There is no silver bullet here, you are the silver bullet, the work and effort you put in will transform your life. hope to see you around the meetings

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