Parental alienation anonymous (PAA) and Non-violent communication (NVC) support group.
WHAT IS NVC?
NVC (nonviolent communication) is an empathy-based form of communication. If practiced it transforms every relationship in our lives, starting with our relationship to ourselves. We are not conditioned to be good listeners. Generally, we are more interested in what we have to say, fixing or saving someone else and in protecting our ideas and constructs. This inhibits us from really hearing ourselves and others. NVC gives us a framework to transform how we communicate and engage with every person in our lives.
There are 4 basic stages to working with and understanding NVC. Observations, feelings, needs & requests.
1-Observations
Instead of listening to someone’s story or narrative we practice listening to what they are actually trying to communicate by trying to understand their feelings and needs.
2-Feelings
We use discernment to try and uncover our or someone else’s feelings.
3-Needs
Under every feeling is a need we are trying to meet. For example, I can be feeling anxious because I have a need for safety.
4-Requests
Once I identify me needs or others needs it is important to discern if any action is needed. In the example above I figured out I was anxious because I had a need for safety. My request might be “can we please leave this restaurant”.
WHY IS THIS SO IMPORTANT FOR FOLKS STRUGGLING WITH PARENTAL ALIENATION?
Stuffed and stored emotions block the life force in our bodies. This is especially true with folks struggling with any form of parental alienation and/or as estrangement. These blockages interfere with our ability to fully engage life’s joys and obstacles. In order to be fully present and available in every conversation and form of communication we have to start resolving some of these internal and external coping mechanisms. Our kids, grandkids and all others in our lives will be the beneficiaries of us cultivating these new skills.
This level 1 group will focus on needs, feelings and ultimately requests. As we share our feelings, recognize our needs and then ask for our needs to be met(request), the emotional blockages are released and we can engage life in a new and meaningful way. As we learn to understand our own needs and feelings we can finally start understanding what others are needing and felling as well.
“When our emotions are free to flow everything becomes possible”
Please google NVC (non violent communication) if you are not familiar with it. It is an empathy based form of communication which when used will transform relationships.
I am a mother and grandmother. Both my sons have walked away from me and their father. I am suffering from severe depression and anxiety and not coping at all. I found this group and hope to learn from others how to survive my pain. Pls help me
HI Dee,
we would love to have you join our community. It really is a beautiful place of support, shared reality and a place to grow emotionally and spiritually. I will add you to the email list, all meetings are currently on zoom. 7 meetings a week, 6 days a week. Try some different ones as participants and topics vary.
You will have an email in your in box in 30 minutes , please check your spam if you don’t see it.
happy days:))
Hi…
Great to be a part of the meeting today!
Thanks to all!
I think it was the Secretary today Joel was sending out links to the nvc mtg today…I am not finding it in my email…
I did receive some emails from Lawrence earlier today and there is a place to download a word document, but it is not downloading for me…but I did not see a link for a zoom meeting. Something did come up about Skype when I tried to download the word document but not sure if this has anything to do with the mtg.
Also folks were saying today it is at 3pm but I saw on the site that it is at 4pm …so I’m confused.
Any help regarding the above would be greatly appreciated!
Thanks Meredith
Great to hear you really enjoyed the meeting today:)) Please check your inbox I sent out the relevant links.
hope to see you later
Would love to sign up. What would the dates and timings be?
HI Feroza,
I will sign you up on the group email for the event. Times are every Saturday 4pm PST, 75 minutes sessions. Last week was our 1st and it was a great experience.
Hope to see you there, please respond to the email with any questions.
ty
support
Where are these meetings held? Would love to attend have been alienated from my older boys ages 19 and 17 for 4 years now.
HI Diane,
we would love to have you join our community. It really is a beautiful place of support, shared reality and a place to grow emotionally and spiritually. I will add you to the email list, all meetings are currently on zoom. 7 meetings a week, 6 days a week. Try some different ones as participants and topics vary.
You will have an email in your in box in 30 minutes , please check your spam if you don’t see it.
happy days:))
HI Rebecca,
Sound’s like a really challanging situation. Guessing some support would be useful? Our groups are great, they help build community and a solid base for regaining a semblance of your life.
If you are looking for relief the groups and the 12 steps are fantastic. It takes a lot of emotional work and a willingness to work on your own emotional and spiritual coping mechanisms. If you do the work on yourself you will have a new found sense of ease and be able to relate to your child from a grounded resourced place.
This is hard work and there is no quick fix. It has saved and changed my life but (step 1) I had to make the decision to surrender the idea of control over any other person but myself.
The meetings are 6 days a week. Come to as many as possible for 90 days and then make a decision if the group supports your need for safety, growth and hope.
Check your email for links, I added you to the list.
Hi, I’m interested in joining the NVC PAA group. I have had no contact with my now 18 y/o daughter for almost 4 years and have a terribly hard time managing the feelings of grief, helplessness, hopelessness that are present every day. I feel alone with this and am having a hard time taking constructive action for myself, have become addicted to emotional escape strategies to get a break from my bad feelings.
Hi Jennifer,
You are currently on the mailing list. There is a link in Wednesdays email, if you don’t see the email please try your spam. You have been added to the group for Saturday, just click the link and we will see you there. I am also sending an email with a word doc to print and the adjusted time for this weeks group.
ty
Hello all,
I’m a hopeless father alienated from my son(11yrs old) since the last 9 months. Despite court orders of weekly video calls & visitation, my son’s mother has never complied with the court order. I’m really shattered inside since the Other Side plays the card – your child doesn’t want to speak or see you. Just need some support to continue to be alive and become hopeful that one day maybe he will come and see me. Your help & support will be deeply appreciated.
welcome to our community.
We have a robust wonderful, supportive community. I have added you to the weekly emails with meeting links and times. Come out and join us, it is incredible healing.
Hi
I’d like to go on a meeting but can’t find a link or anything, any suggestions?
CarolAnne
please check your inbox or spam, i added you to the weekly email.
Hello,
My son is 14 and I have been “watching” this painful process slowly take place over the past 10 years. Right before the pandemic, Feb. 2019, hit is when this third try by my ex occurred. But now I am completely alienated especially since Aug. and my son is with my ex. Looking for support and advice on how to legally prepare on my own in preparation should my ex decide to take me back to court for the 4th time to try and get sole custody. This is such a horrible thing that they get away with. How does one become part of one of the Zoom support groups? Probably the one on Wednesday’s
Hi and welcome to the community….It sounds like your journey has been long and incredible challanging. The meetings are a great place to get support and have an opportunity to be active member in a community of folks struggling with similar challenges. Please check your email/spam as i added you to the group email with links and meeting info.
Could I please join these weekly meetings? I am a single mother with a narcissistic ex who has completely alienated me from my only child and I am struggling severely as a result. Any time I have had the chance to speak to my daughter I become very emotional and distressed and it’s just pushing her away further so I need to learn how to regulate my emotions more effectively.
I am very interested in completing training in NVC. Can someone please help me find this information.
I suggest attending meetings. You will get to meet other people struggling with similar circumstances and to to gain access to a bunch of different resources. All meetings are on zoom and accessible from anywhere.
New NVC trainings start in April, make sure you are on the e ail list so you get these notifications.
You can register on the website to the pop-up and get added to the weekly email lists or you can send an email to Parentalalienationanonymous@Gmail.com with any other questions.
I hope to see you at a meeting. Have a beautiful day.
Hello are there still meetings? I would like to participate and learn about NVC.
I suggest attending meetings. You will get to meet other people struggling with similar circumstances and to to gain access to a bunch of different resources. You can also learn more about NVC on our website or NVC academy has all kinds of resources.
New NVC meetings will start in April so make sure you are on the email list.
You can register on the website to the pop-up and get added to the weekly email lists or you can send an email to Parentalalienationanonymous@Gmail.com with any other questions.
I hope to see you at a meeting. Have a beautiful day.