NVC Requests for connection

Requests for connection, through attunement to self and others. Please do this work sheet in order and where useful do not supply or look at the all the questions at once.

1.Bring to mind a person whom you have some energy/conflict with.

  • Write a brief paragraph about your observations. Please keep it brief, 4-5 sentences if possible.
  • What request would you make of this person? Be messy, be sure to include your feelings and needs. There is no need for this to be perfect or solely NVC based.

2.Make a list of what this person would be feeling and a second list of what they might need in this situation.

  • Other person’s feelings.
  • Other person’s needs.

3.Make an empathetic NVC based response to this person based on their needs and feelings you just identified.

  • Connection statement- please come up with 3 different variations

4.Once you find a statement that feels like it creates a sense of attunement in you please consider what requests would follow this connection statement.

  • Attuning request- please come up with 3 different variations.





5.Go back to your original statement and make a list of your feelings and needs.

  • Needs
  • Feelings

Compare your feelings to the person that you are trying to connect with. What similarities and differences do you see?


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